Well, of COURSE it did.

We're back from camping, but that's not why I'm here.

Months ago, in a land far away, a plumber (A plumber, you say? This can't end well, can it?) told me that one way to clean my garbage disposal was to grind a bunch of ice up in it. The ice will freeze to the gack in the disposal and clear it away.

Sounds reasonable, doesn't it?

I dumped the better part of two bags of ice out of our cooler into the sink. Hey! Maybe I could clean the disposal while I'm here. I grab a wooden spatula, turn the water on, flip the disposal switch and start cleaning away!

La, la, la.
La, la, la.
Clean, clean, clean.
La, la, la.
La, la, ... heh? Why are my feet getting wet?

I fling open the cabinet doors and sure enough. THE PIPE FROM THE DISPOSAL TO THE DRAIN HAS FROZEN AND CRACKED THE HELL OUT OF ITSELF.

The end.

School

You don't have to be smart to work there.

I don't know if I have told you about the ordeal we had with the school here or not. I'm guessing I didn't, so here goes.

A month or so before school was to start, I started calling the superintendent's office to talk to someone about getting The Boy's records sent up here. No answer. Repeatedly. I called the elementary school's office. The custodian answered. She had no clue. I finally drove up to the school and wandered the halls looking for a human. I ran into the counselor (Nice lady.) and she found someone for me to give our phone number to. I waited about a week and no call. I called back up to the superintendent's office and the secretary answered. Oh yeah, she had gotten my number, but hadn't had a chance to call me yet. I jumped in the car and went up to the office to sign the form to get the records sent up. A week later, still haven't heard anything. I called the school, got transferred to another secretary who told me she had gotten the stuff from the other secretary and would be working on it.

THREE DAYS before school was to start, The Commander, The Boy, and I marched into the superintendent's office and demanded to know what the hell was going on. THREE DAYS before school was to start and no one had bothered to contact us. THREE DAYS before school was to start and we had no idea who The Boy's teacher was much less if he was even enrolled in school.

Oops, sorry, blah, blah, blah, ha ha ha, perfect spot for him, call elementary, schedule meeting with teacher, sorry again, ha ha ha.

So the boy has been in school for more than a month and things have been going well. Until today.

The phone rings and it is the school.

Um...yeah...uh, we don't have The Boy's records from his other school. We faxed the request and we didn't receive anything and so-n-so threw away the fax and I usually keep them and can you give me the name of his old school?

Jeebus.