Thursday, May 24, 2007

Many A Mile

Here's what I wrote last Sunday...

Good morning, good morning, it’s time to rise and shine!

Wow, three in the morning comes way too early. Who scheduled me on a 6:30am flight anyway? Oh, that was me.

I’m flying (as we speak!) in first class. Yeah, baby. First class. This is the first, and probably the last, time I have flown first class. So far, not much different from coach except I am on my 2nd free Bloody Mary and it is only 7:15 in the morning. Plus, I’m watching Trailer Park Boys on my laptop, so life is pretty good right now.

One thing I don’t like about first class is that once you get situated with your first Bloody Mary, all of the lowly coach passengers are boarding and staring, either with contempt or with envy, at your Bloody Mary. They should have a second door for boarding so those coach passengers can’t judge us first classers with our free drinks.

Anywho, the Commander’s surgery has been moved to Tuesday so we have an extra day together without the neck brace.

His co-workers are wanting to take me to Landry’s Seafood House for lunch tomorrow. I can’t stand seafood. It stinks and it tastes bad. But evidently, they have a huge Bananas Foster that they all want me to have. Well, okay. I don’t want to disappoint the co-workers.

I also have an appointment (!) with the Commander’s boss tomorrow at 2:00pm. I’ll try to keep it to a two-martini lunch so I don’t embarrass myself.

I’m now on my next leg of my trip after a quick stop at the Houston Mall airport. That place has everything: Brookstone, Museum of Modern Art store, a Houston Space Center store, Swatch, etc. I didn’t have enough time to cruise Brookstone, but I did make it into the MOMA store and the Space Center store. And I grabbed some cinnamon sugar pretzel sticks from Auntie Anne’s.

Of course Bloody Marys don’t go well with cinnamon pretzel sticks so when the flight attendant asked what I wanted to drink and I told her milk, she repeated it twice – Milk? Milk? She looked at me like I had ordered an M-16 and a couple of hookers. The male attendant laughed and said she probably expected me to order something a little stronger. (I guess they have a lot of drunks in first class.) He also told me that milk wasn’t the strangest request they had. Once a man asked them if they had strawberry milk.

Anywho...a lot has happend since Sunday - a margarita and a Mai Tai just to mention a couple.

The Commander's surgery went okay and we are halfway home (The Amarillo Holiday Inn Express). We got behind a cattle truck this afternoon and the front of the Element is now covered in bovine excrement.

I mentally wrote a bunch of blog entries these past few days, but I didn't have a chance to get internet access with all of the hospital going to and from, emptying out the fridge, washing clothes and packing (and drinking). So as my CRAFT brain remembers things, I will try to post them here for your entertainment.

For instance, things like this following conversation I had in the hospital's dining facility while in line for breakfast:

Army Guy in line in front of me - Bean and egg?
Me - Did you just say "bean and egg"?
AG - Yeah, bean and egg burritos. This ain't no Taco Cabana.

Friday, May 18, 2007

Kiss me and smile for me.

Hello! Have you missed me? I’ve missed you.

The Commander was in town this past weekend. We skipped school on Wednesday and played tourists in The City. (Oklahoma City, not New York City. Yeah, it confused me too when I first moved here.)

We ate lunch at Toby Keith’s I Love This Bar And Grill. They give service members a free All American Cheeseburger and Fries (One per lifetime. Some service members were taking advantage. Tisk.) Good thing it was free. Mr. Toby Keith, I know you make a crapload of money so why must you charge $8.99 for a cheeseburger and fries? I can get pretty much the same thing at the bowling alley for $3.50. Plus, the fries there are better.

We visited Bass Pro Shop. Which I totally lurve. I rarely buy anything, but I love to meander the aisles. (I did buy two packs of these to keep the edges of the tarp down around the pool.)

Then we hopped on the Water Taxi and cruised the canal for a while. We got off at one point and had shaved ice. The girl working the t-shirt/flags of the world/shaved ice kiosk was a graduate of Oklahoma State University (Go Pokes!). It made me proud to see her putting her degree to work. (Probably a Bachelor of Fine Arts, but that’s neither her nor there.)

Then we dropped the Commander off at the airport and headed home. Right. During. Rush. Hour. I closed my eyes and drove. We made it home in one piece. Yippee!

The Commander bought a pool for us while he was here. One of those blue, easy-set pools. (We had one for three years before the inflatable ring exploded in the cold weather. We got a different one last year and the “wind sweeping down the plains” made short work of it. Now we are back to the original style. I like it better.) We got it set up (Easily!) and now I just have to hook the pump and filter up. Crossing my fingers on the pump. We don’t use the one that comes with the pool. The first year we did that, the pump wasn’t powerful enough to circulate the water so we bought a ginormous sand filter and pump. This is year 4 (5?) for them and last year, the pump was acting like an old woman. Cranky. When she worked, she worked. When she didn’t work, damn skippy she wasn’t working.

The neighbors are having a going away party tonight. They are moving out next Wednesday and taking The Boy’s playmates with them. Their daughter is two months older than him and the son is two years older. They play like gang busters. I bought him a Fortamajig for him to play with after they move. He doesn’t know I bought it yet. I’ll get it out for him next week.

Or rather my Mom will. I will be in the beautiful, scenic Ft. Bliss, Texas. Yee-haw. (Notice no exclamation point?) The Commander is having neck surgery next week. There goes his modeling career. No one wants a model with a scar on his neck. Or do they? Hmmmm…might make him look more rugged. HA! HA! HA! A model. I crack me up.

Anywho…I’m flying (First Class!) down there Sunday and will be driving his doped-up body home later in the week. Me + Driving ≠ Happy Camper.

I’m taking my laptop with me to watch some videos on the plane and in the hospital’s waiting room. I’ve borrowed the Japanese version of Shall We Dance. I’m also taking Waiting for Guffman and The Big White. (If you haven’t seen “The Big White”, go get it now. Seriously. But only if you liked the movie “Fargo”.) I am also supposed to be getting a season of Trailer Park Boys from someone else, but he forgot it this morning and I’m betting dollars to donuts he didn’t get it at lunch like he said he would.*

I don’t know how the internet situation will be while I’m down there, so if you don’t hear from me for a week or so, it’s not you, it’s me.

*UPDATE! He not only brought one season, he brought THREE seasons! Dang, I was hoping for a bear claw.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

I'm blue

Ignore the spacing problem. It's not my fault!

You are most like:


You are a #5 pop single. Well known, and often repeated, you are an old friend to us all. Though sometimes old friends get on our nerves if we see/hear too much of them. You are generally lighthearted and cooperative, and you love to sing about nothing, or anything.


Take this quiz: What Carly Simon Song Are You?

You are most like:

Selective Procrastinator

As a selective procrastinator, you know how to procrastinate but only do it when you feel you can afford to.
Your a faker!


Take this quiz: How Bad A Procrastinator Are You?

You are most like:

You are Blue

You are cool and soothing, with a hidden spontanious side. You are deeper than most people percieve, and you care a lot for those whom you surround yourself with.


Take this quiz: Which Crayola Box of 8 Color Are You?

Monday, May 14, 2007

Celebrity Look-Alikes

This cracks me up.

Angela Lansbury? Seriously?

Evidently, I favor blacks and hispanics. Queen Latifah? I can deal with that. She's pretty. And I was just mentioning this weekend how cute I thought Xzibit is.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Sweet Bama Pie

Internal thoughts during my massage...

Norah Jones. I like her. I'm glad I brought the CD. She is so HOLY MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS HOLY! calming.

This is so nice. I really enjoy spending SWEET 8 POUND 6 OUNCE BABY JESUS! thirty minutes doing absolutely CRAP! WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SHOVE UNDER MY SHOULDER BLADE? A DULL AXE?! nothing but being attended to. Sweet.

I may bring my Jack Johnson AAAAAARRRRGGGHHHHH! THAT'S WHERE MY SCIATIC NERVE IS LADY! ENOUGH WITH THE PRESSURE! CD next time. The Curious George sound SCHNICKEY! track is pretty calming as well.

Mmmmmmmm. Nice. YOU DO THAT ONE MORE TIME AND I'M PUNCHING YOU IN THE HEAD! I need to make sure I schedule another SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT! massage in a couple of weeks.

Ooooooooh. The hot rocks. I OW! OW! OW! OW! love the hot rocks.

Oh no. She's getting the HOT TOWEL! HOT! HOT! HOT! hot towel. Dang. I'm almost done.

Thanks! See you in a couple of weeks!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

High Tea in The Parlor Makes The Ladies Holla!

I'm having tea with the Junior Service League this afternoon. (I know. I'm sorry. But there is a good reason.)

SHE'S going to be there.

I have to go practice holding my pinky out. Wish me luck.

Monday, May 07, 2007

The Dairy Hut!

The Dairy Hut!
Originally uploaded by Sherrypg.
Where I chose to eat for my birthday.

(Click to see more exciting birthday photos!)

Friday, May 04, 2007


My loving husband *cough* sent me a birthday card that was, shall we say, quirky. To sum it up, it has a picture of the Grim Reaper on it. Nice.

But when I opened the package with the presents he had sent, he was forgiven.

Thanks Commander. I'll see you in a week.

Thursday, May 03, 2007


Here are some better photos of Matt and Trucky.

Ignore the overgrown grass.

This photo has all THREE! of Matt's vehicles in it. Hopefully we will be selling the car that is directly in front of Trucky.

Happy Happy Joy Joy

We like the cars. The cars that go BOOM.

He hasn't been allowed to have passengers (except for Christopher). He asked me if it would be okay to start having just one. I told him I wanted him to read this first.

"If Everyone"

If everyone who drives a car, would lie a month in bed,

With broken bones, and stitched up wounds, or fractures of the head,

And there endure the agonies that many people do,

They’d never need preach safety anymore to me and you.

If everyone could meet the wife and children left behind,

And step into the darkened home where once the sunlight shined,

To look upon the vacant chair, where Daddy used to sit,

I’m sure some reckless drivers would be forced to think a bit.

If everyone who takes the wheel, would say a little prayer,

And keep in mind those in the car depending on his care,

And make a vow and pledge himself to never take a chance,

A great crusade for safety would suddenly advance.

-----Author Unknown